what a difference a few years make...

[February 2019  draft]

Hello,

Sometimes this blogging business stresses me out. As always, it is Saturday, and I have procrastinated/wasted most of the day. Today, sadly, I spent £16.00 to get to and from my GP practice, hoping to get some skills signed off from my skills logbook; big mistake, HUGE! Not only did it waste money, but it also ruined my day's energy, and I didn't snap out of it as well as I could have. I did cauterise two pairs of vas deferentia, though, so I guess you could say I am ready to be a urologist. I  honestly think I could single-handedly perform a vasectomy, honestly.  

Anyway, though not a professional blog, my blog stresses me out because I want it to look perfect. I am not there yet in terms of its aesthetics at the moment. Please help. I wonder why I feel like this, because I decided that this was just going to be an online diary and nothing more. Last bit of negative energy, I lost my purse. I honestly feel like I threw it in the bin by mistake, you know, those things you do without realising. I owned that purse for over six years, I think...my mom bought it for me one of the past Christmases. I wasn't particularly fond of it, but now that I don't have a purse, so it is natural to miss it (let those with ears hear what the spirit of the Lord is saying to the seven churches. [It is saying I'd appreciate a purse as a gift soonest, thank you]).

On positive vibes. I had the best Valentine's Day ever. Ever, none of your faves could ever. I spent the day hiking with _Sanks_; the weather and all the elements were working in our favour. Then a young walk at my oh-so-beautiful campus, the sunset was epic. Keele has one of the most beautiful campuses ever. I tried to make dinner, but my food always wyls when I am cooking for others, so it's essentially a mess. And I won Puffedupearly's 100 USD giveaway... and ohh, the best cherry on top: I got flowers from Sara. I told you all, gang good things coming our (my) way this year. It was a beautiful day, and I didn't want it to end.

_Sanks_, I gotta say his name right, is honestly one of the coolest people I have ever hung out with. Swear down! He is topping the MCM list at present.

27th May 2026 

Haha, what a difference the passing of time makes...! 

1. I waste a lot more money now, and I have a credit card, a bad habit, but yeah...It is so humbling to see that I used to sweat over £16.00 as a student. 

2. The more things change, the more they stay the same: I am now in a specialist training programme... I think I mostly like and enjoy... but skills are hard to come by, so I have forfeited £24.00 of a pilates class so I can do an LP. I think I  have mastered LPs...it is umbilical catheters and intubations I want... but while I wait in the LORD in shall be faithful with the little I have been given. Still an NHS bi***  

3. And speaking of, we are due to strike soon, and gosh, I am tired. I never thought, in this day and age and this first-world life, this would be my reality... at least my salary will be a full one. I am so money-anxious at the moment; the wedding and the cost of living have made me feel even more so... 

- praying for a really good pay deal 

- praying for a getaway (LOL - what has that got to do with anything)

- praying for a few escalated + £20 shifts 

4. I married the MCM in question, some 8 years later... we actually started dating a year after this hiking hangout, one of my bestest life decisions...

longing for Paris