mountains

 My honest appraisal of myself is that I am a below-average SHO, not even in extracurricular stuff, the core stuff. I am always making mistakes, blanking, or just creating more work, really, and I am super slow!! 

How am I gonna fix that? 

- Decelerate training (lol, I think I need more time as SHO, ideally a year really)

- continue trying - you learn by trying, just keep trying, trying, trying and asking for help

Being kind to myself feels like saying, 'Awwww, la la la.' I need to expect more from myself and be firmer with myself. 

- I bought a laptop as the first step of many. I mean, I think my resolution for wanting to be better at work has been evolving, so ofc sometimes I will be met with how strikingly bad I am (read mountains in my way) but.. re tla phomelelaa

- I do not wanna do any thinking today, so I will study, study, and do a long run, 8 pm? aim for 15 K